What is it with men, anyway? Chances are you’ve spent more than your share of long nights on the phone or tossing back a margarita or two with your girlfriends, asking that very question. And chances are, your girlfriends nodded and shrugged and sympathized, knowing exactly how you felt. But from where I stand, asking a woman to explain the feelings of a man is sort of like asking Donald Rumsfeld to explain hip-hop music. We’d all be a lot better off if we looked for answers closer to the source. Here, for the first time ever, we’ve gotten them to show their cards on some of your top questions:
Q: Why does a guy say he’ll call and then doesn’t?
A: He’s thinking like a jockey at the start of a horse race. He doesn’t want to pull out of the gates too fast. Waiting a few days allows him to set a comfortable pace before he makes a move. Any longer than that probably means he’s pulled himself up and plans on entering another race, another day.
Q: Why do guys email instead of call?
A: He’d written 14 drafts of that email to convey the perfect balance of witty, flirty, and complimentary without making it seem like he tried too hard. He doesn’t fear conversation; he’s just banking on the fact that his first email popping into your inbox gives you as much of a jolt as you give him.
Q: Why won’t men dance?
A: Dancing feels like public speaking. He hates the potential of looking stupid doing it—especially because you look so good.
Q: Why do guys brag so much about their career and how much money they make?
A: It’s the opposite of cockiness—it’s insecurity. What he’s trying to do, actually, is give you some confidence in him, even if he doesn’t have it himself.
Q: Why does he offer to cook me dinner for a third date?
A: He has life skills (to show you he’d make a good mate), he has a clean place (to show you he’d make a good mate), and he has high-thread count sheets (in case you’d like to mate).
Q: Why doesn’t he ever notice that I got a haircut or major color change? Is he just not looking at me?
A: It’s not that he doesn’t notice. It’s that you give him four-and-a-half seconds to say that he noticed before asking him why he didn’t notice and then telling your friends that you can’t believe he didn’t notice. Give him some time to get settled in; he’ll give you the compliment you deserve.
Q: Why won’t he sleep over after sex?
A: Men are practical—he’s not thinking about the symbolic nature of leaving your apartment after orgasm. If he has work the next morning, he wants to wake up with easy access to his own wardrobe and his own razor.
Q: Why do men clam up during a fight?
A: It could mean two things: One, he doesn’t want to say something that will get a turkey roaster thrown at him. Or two, he knows that keeping silent will make you so mad that you’ll want to throw a turkey roaster at him.
Q: What does it mean when he says he’s not ready for a commitment?
A: You’re not The One. If you were, he’d be ready for a commitment, even if he wasn’t.
Q: What does it mean if he’s still friends with his ex years after the breakup?
A: Take it as a positive that he’s a good man, not as a negative that she’s a threat. If their breakup didn’t cause permanent damage, then chances are that, one, he’s mature enough to let relationships evolve; two, he probably treated her well during their time together; and three, he didn’t screw around on her. All good.
Q: Why is it so hard for guys to write a personal message in a birthday card? Every year all I get is “Love, Jim.”
A: Five minutes on the way back from the drugstore doesn’t give a whole lot of time to come up with something clever. Plus, he’d rather let a nice dinner and a show do the talking for him.
Source:Hindustanis.org
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